Aging gray-fully

"Honey, time marches on and eventually you realize it is marchin' across your face."

It's a brilliant line for Dolly Parton's character in the alpha chick flick Steel Magnolias. And within the last year I've noticed the troops on the move, with some blitzkrieg activity going on in my under-eye region.

I always said I wanted to grow old gracefully, swearing I'd never color over my gray hair, fuss over a wrinkle or have a little work done by my friendly neighborhood plastic surgeon. But I've come to realize that's a pretty easy thing to say when one is 25 and hasn't yet experienced what multiple pregnancies will do to her mid section.

A few months ago I spotted my first gray hair emerging from where else but front and center, hovering above my forehead. Here I have to make an exception because I actually got a little excited about it. I am kind of eager to see what I look like when the gray hair gets some friends. My dad has a thick head of silvery-white hair, and I figure that if my gray hair looks like his I may just want to keep it. But I think I'll keep my Clairol coupons handy in case I'm disappointed.

What I don't appreciate is the revelation that the makeup I've been using since college no longer looks so smooth over skin that's beginning to lose its elasticity. I guess I'll soon be upgrading to the "age defying" formula, and that hurts.

That's not to say that I'm terribly discouraged by getting older. I take solace in these words recorded by King Solomon recorded in Proverbs 16:31: "Gray hair is a crown of splendor; it is attained in the way of righteousness."

Still, our society caters to the youthful, wrinkle-free population and we respond by pretending we're among them. Ask Abercrombie & Fitch - it uses practically naked teenagers to sell about $3 billion worth of clothing annually. I still haven't figured that one out. Seriously, do you think your abs are going to look like that if you buy a pair of their jeans? My husband recently observed that a new Cadillac commercial that juxtaposes a mid-life couple sipping tea across the dinner table, a voice-over of the words "cold" and "boring" in the background, with vivacious 20-somethings driving Cadillacs with a sporty new design. Cadillac knows it has to appeal to younger drivers to survive, so they throw the rest of us under the bus.

Years ago Annie Lennox released a song called Keep Young and Beautiful, satirically stating what we seem to believe - "It's your duty to be beautiful."

Take care of all those charms

And you'll always be in someone's arms

Keep young and beautiful 

If you want to be loved

The lyrics smack us right in the face, don't they? Truly the sentiment is beyond offensive, yet it's what society is selling. And we buy it.

Granted, I'm 33 and only beginning to see my metamorphosis, but in my own defense I've been over 30 at heart since puberty. Tonight I'll likely spend a good 15 or 20 minutes before bed, exfoliating my face with pink goop containing microbeads and slathering on what seems like pounds of moisturizer. I don't expect it to turn back the clock by tomorrow morning, and that's OK. There's little I can do about that. What I can do is work on the positive side of aging.

Solomon wasn't making a statement about the color of a person's hair, rather he was commenting on the wisdom we hope to acquire along life's journey. And since I believe Proverbs 9:10 - "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding." - I seek to grow in my relationship with Him. And while the world will see each of us age and take pity, God will see His people growing closer to Him. He thinks it looks good on us.

At the end of Proverbs, Solomon agreed, and that's a lot coming from a man who had 1,000 wives and concubines (The wisest man in the Bible also was extremely flawed, but that's another story.) He said, "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised." I have to say I'd rather have that etched on my tombstone than "She had the skin of a newborn."